Makati City Mayor Jejomar “Jojo” Binay on Tuesday announced his intent to run for president in the 2010 national elections,He announced his intent during the 66th Foundation of the Makati City Hall.

Cong.Teddy Boy Locsin has introduced Binay as The “Obama” of the Philippines,But the difference according to them is that No one questions about Binay’s Experience when he Seated in The City’s High office.

Well,For me,Every Filipino Politician has the Right to Claim that They are the “Obama” of the Philippines,Tutal May Maitim naman sa kanila….YUNG BUDHI!

*****

When asked who will be His Running Mate,Mayor Binay Said : “Kahit sino,Basta yung May Buhok sa Noo ha?”

*****

The Philippine government rejected a request to defer a refund of foreign currency fees collected by the Manila Electric Co. (Meralco).

MERALCO Consumers were happy about this,ABS-CBN Talents felt dis-appointed.

*****

The Main reason why MERALCO wants to defer their refund is that they could not Give all the Refunds at The same time since They have to do 3 Diferrent refunding tasks.[First is the P 3.9 B CERA Overcharge,Second is the P 2.9 B Meter deposit "Scam",Third is the P 30 B Overcharging from 1994-2003]

If the ERC will not grant their petition,The utility Co. will get another Loan just to repay their Consumers…Paano yan Eh di madadagdagan na yung P 3 Billion na Utang ng ABS-CBN?

*****

In other News,Bayani Fernando has been Declared as the Newest Celebrity Duets Champion [Though for me,It is QUITE expected]…Of course MMDA Employees were happy,But Most of our Drivers are still wondering how it happen since they had voted for Phil Younghusband.

*****

EXCLUSIVE : THE HEADLINES TEAM recently got some reactions from Different Personalities,As well as the Ordinary Filipino People,With regards to Bayani Fernando as The Celebrity Duets Champion,Here it is.:

Marikina Mayor Maritess Fernando : Galing talaga ng Stategy ng aking honey,Pag di kasi nila binoto ang asawa ko,Wala silang NFA Rice!

Melanie Marquez : It’s not my problem Anymore….It’s my Brother’s Problem anymore!

Phil Younghusband : Bekeyt siyeh eng Binowtow niyeow? beykeyt dei ekow? Ekele ko bei mes gweypow ekow se kenyie? Geleyng kow nang Mag-tegelowg now?

First Daughter Luli Arroyo : Bwisit ka JC,Ang laki ng Ginastos ko para lang Iboto ka,Nag-Loan pa ako sa Bangko para lang sa Load na gagastusin ko sa iyo,Tapos matatalo Ka lang?!?!? Sumagot ka baklita ka,SUMAGOT KAAAAAA!!!!!!

MMDA Traffic Enforcer : Sir,Nanalo na kayo…Baka pwede na niyong ibalik yung Load na inubos ko para sa inyo?

Bus Driver : Okey lang na manalo siya,Basta ba after that,May Kotong Holiday ang mga Tauhan niya?

Barack Obama : Bayani Fernando WHAT?????

And Last But NOT the least :

ABS-CBN : This is non-sense,The Other Network has given P 500 and Groceries to some texters So that they could vote for Fernando!

*****

BATTLE OF THE HEADLINES :

Broadsheet : Binay,Obama of the Phils. – Locsin

Tabloid : Binay,Maitim ang…..ang…..ang…..Balat! – Locsin

Barack Obama has the Biggest Chance of Winning the Race for Presidency in The United States,The World’s Powerful Country.

It seems that The US was Enlightened by An Afro-American.

***

Senator John Mc Cain,However,Said that he won’t be waiving his White flag unless the votes are casted,He’s confident he will win,While saying it,His Pants turned WET.

***

The Commission on Elections [COMELEC] of the Philippines is observing the Polls for the 2008 US National Elections,The Commission wants to know the Process of Election Automation in the Said Country so that in 2010,They will use it for Cheating in Favor of PGMA’s bets…

***

BREAKING NEWS : The Batangas Coffee Farmers have created a New Coffee Variant inspired by The 2008 US National Elections,This new variant is Darker than Any other Coffee Variants in the World.

The New Variant will Be Called KAPENG BARAKO……BAMA.

***

US ELECTION SLOGAN :

Barack Obama : Change…We Need

John Mc Cain : Country First

Eliseo Dela Paz : Money CHANGEr for the COUNTRY of Euros.

***

FUTURE HEADLINES :

Barack Obama wins ; America will be having a “BLACK” christmas this Year.

Barack Obama wins ; America sees new LIGHT

Barack Obama wins ; Charcoal Business boomed

Barack Obama wins ; Arroyo jumped for Joy.

Barack Obama wins ; Mahmoud Ahmadinejad sighed in Relief

John Mc Cain : “Obama Cheated ; He called Garci”

John Mc Cain : “Obama Cheated ; He brought flying voters from Africa.

***

JOC-JOC-JOC…. BOLANTE!

QUESTION : Ano ang Tunay na Apelyido ni Chris Tiu?

SAGOT : Ferminit,Pwede ring Ferdelion…..

***

PERSONALS :

I Hope that The Next President of the United States will Implement REAL Reformation in their Government,He should think that His Country that he is ruling Right now is The Most Powerful in The World,Hence,He should Humble his Country and always remeber to Put his Feet on the Ground,Because For me,A Humble Person will be Raised by GOD.

PS : Don’t forget to send me some Dollars!

Have a Nice Day Everyone!

Jocelyn “Joc-Joc” Bolante returned to the Phils. after several Years of “Hiding”,The Senate assumes that this will be the end of Their Investigation regading The Fertilizer Fund Scam,Executive Sec. Eduardo Ermita,However,Told the Media that The Government wasn’t worried about Joc-joc’s Comeback,His voice is Somewhat Shaky while saying this.

***

President Arroyo says she’s not worried about Joc-joc’s Return in the Country,Her knees were shivering and Her Long skirt is wet while saying this.

***

Anyways,Is it true that The Brand Name of The Dextrose that St.Lukes is giving to Joc-Joc Bolante is “UREA COMPLETE”?

***

EXCLUSIVE : The HEADLINES News Team was given by the Senate a Chance to Interview the “Architect” of Fertilizer Fund Scam,Mr.Jocelyn “Joc-Joc” Bolante via Phone,Here now is the transcript of that Interview :

HEADLINES TEAM [HT] : Hello,Sir

JOCELYN “JOC-JOC” BOLANTE [JJ] : Yes,Who’s This?

HT : We are from the HEADLINES Blog,We want to get your side on The Fertilizer Fund Issue,Is it true that it has been used as The Administration’ Campaign Fund for The 2004 Presidential Elections?

JJ : Sorry,I could not answer your Question right now…

HT : Why not?

JJ : I am in the Hospital Right now

HT : And why are you in the Hospital?

JJ : Of Course,I’m not feeling well,I am sick!

HT : And why are you sick?

JJ : Because I…A…hey,Wait a minute,Why are you asking me like That?

HT : And why not?

JJ : Are you Crazy,You should Know the Answer!

HT : And why do you think we Know the Answer to that Question?

JJ : A….What the…Oh my God,This is terrible,You’re Insane!

HT : And Why do you think we are Insane?

JJ : Because You are asking Non-sense Questions!

HT : How sure are you it is Non-sense?

JJ : You’re so pathetic?

HT : If we are pathetic,Then How about you?

JJ : I will go Crazy because of You!

HT : If you will go Crazy,Then Why are you there in That “General” Hospital? You should go to a Mental Institution or See some Psychiathrist…

JJ : You know what,I don’t know who are you,Or What’s on Your Bloody mind,For I am sick of your Non-sense Questions…Stop Asking That way!

HT : Of course we Should,We are the Interviewer,That’s why we are asking…Isn’t it obvious?

JJ : ***Silent Mode***

HT : Now,before we end this,May I know why did you answer all of our questions even If you don’t want to answer because you are in the Hospital?

JJ : ***A loud bang was heard from his place,It seems that he has thrown his Cellphone…:***

***

Special Report : Anime Titles that suit a Personality,Politician or a Thing.

US Presidential Candidate Barrack Obama : Darker than Black

MMDA Road Signs : Read or Die

Willie Revillame : Devil May Cry

Philippine Congressmen/Sen.Manny Villar/MERALCO : POKEMON [Pocket Monsters]

Tim Yap,John Osmena,GUCCI Gang : Super GALS! / Green-Green

Sen. Jamby Madrigal : Absolute Boy

EX – PNP Controller Eliseo dela Paz : Mysterious Thief Pride

PNP General Jesus Versoza : Elfen LIED

Estonia Computer Hackers : DIGIMON [Digital Monsters]

Baron Guisler/John Estrada : Power Stone [You know what I mean]

Nadia Montenegro : Super Boink

Annabelle Rama and Cristy Fermin: Monster [Not Monster Mom...Just Monster]

And Last but NOT the least :

Philippine President Gloria Arroyo : Jigoku Shoujo

***

BATTLE OF THE HEADLINES :

Broadsheet : Joc-joc Bolante to Face the Senate ; Malacanang dedma.
Tabloid : Joc-joc,Haharap sa Senado ; Arroyo,Sumakit….ANG TIYAN.

***
FOOD FOR THOUGHT BY IMBE : There are Some poor people who Steal because They have Nothing,But There are some rich people who Steal NOT because They don’t have any,But because they want to have More.

OTOBER 31 is a Working Day…Magsipasok kayooooo!!!!

Have a Nice day Everyone!

The Members of Philippine Chamber of Commerce and Industry[PCCI] said on Friday that they had asked MERALCO to postpone their Plans for a Rate Hike since The World Economy is still in Red,And to think of their Social Responsibility to the Public.

MERALCO,However,Reacted to the said Statement : “What Social Responsibility? Wehave to think of ABS-CBN’s Talents…Sumusweldo rin kaya sila?”

***

Today,The Energy Regulatory Commision [ERC] recently ordered the deferment of MERALCO’s Rate Hike due to a Petition Submitted by NASECORE,Requesting the Utility Co. To return what they have overcharged to its Costumers.

The NASECORE was very happy with the Decision,The PCCI thought it was right,ABS-CBN said it was ILLEGAL.

***

EXCLUSIVE : ABS-CBN recently Conducted an “Employees’ Opinion” survey asking on whether the ERC’s decision to stop MERALCO’s Power Rate adjustment was influenced by the Government or Not,They all said NO,When asked why,They replied: “Because It was GMA-7 who influenced them”

***

THE MAIN NEWS : After some years of hiding,Jocelyn “Joc-joc” Bolante will be sent back to the Philippines as soon as possible,The Philippine National Police [PNP] is now preparing for his arrival,PNP will escort him as soon as he arrives,and be brought to The Headquarters of The National Bureau of Investigation [NBI],When asked what will they do to Bolante,They replied : “We will hide him Somewhere in CAVITE [Joc-joc-joc!]

NEWS UPDATE : Joc-joc Bolante will be returning home tonight [Around 11:00 PM Philippine Time] to face the Charges against Him,The Senate prepared a Room for his Overnight Stay there once he gets arrested,The NBI and the PNP,However,prepared his Burial somewhere in Cavite.

MORE NEWS UPDATE : Joc-oc Bolante is Finally Back! The Senate Authorities brought him to a Hospital after his arrival due to unknown Illness [Or I doubt if he really is sick],To which the PNP says : Ay,sayang! Pinasadya pa naman namin yung Kabaong dun sa Cavite!”

BATTLE OF THE HEADLINES:

Broadsheet : Dela Paz,3 Others will face cahrges on Russia Mess
Tabloid : Dela Paz,haharap sa asunto,Misis ni Versoza,Lusot!

PERSONALS :

Have you watched “Experience GMA” last night? What do you think about it?

I have seen the trailer of it on YouTube but then I lost my interest on it when I saw Those Mariposas in one of Regine’s performances,I guess Louie Ignacio directed that Special

CHANGES :

The owner of this Blog will be Launching another Specialty Blog Newt Week,Due to that,There will be some Changes in Updating this Blog.

I’ll be Updating this Blog every Monday,Wednesday,Friday and Sunday…I hope you will still view and Support my Blog,Thank you Very much!

NEXT HEADLINE:

Joc-Joc Bolante’s return
Special Report : Anime and Politics

LTFRB said on Wednesday that it had suspended some routes of Joanna Jesh Bus lines after one of their buses got an accident around midnight of Tuesday in EDSA-Santolan due to overspeeding,killing a Prominent Doctor,The Drivers,However,Got angry at this Decision,They are worried that they might not be able to buy their families’ needs,But Chairman Thompson Lantion replied : “That’s easy!,Baklasin nila ang mga Bus nila,Ibenta nila sa Junkshop…”

***

Still on the Suspension of The Joanna Jesh franchise,The Bus Liner Officials will be summoned by The LTFRB to air their side on this matter,They were also requested to send their reply on whether the LTFBR should remove their License to operate or not,The Bus company will face the Inquiry,And is ready to tell the Board that Their employees are Ordinary Bus Drivers at day,And turn out to be Drag racers at night.

***

The Philippine National Police on Wednesday assured the complete attendance of its senior police officials, including its chief Dir. Gen. Jesus Verzosa, on Thursday’s Senate investigation on the so-called Moscow mess,When asked how they are preparing for the probe,Versoza answered : “We will bring ear plugs para di kami mabingi sa Sermon ni Sen.Santiago”

***

Some Militant Cogresmmen Requested the Energy Regulatory Commision to stop the upcoming Rate Hike of MERALCO when they learned that The Philippine’s Largest Energy Distributor would actually Earn more after it was allowed to collect higher rates,The Congressmen accused MERALCO of profiteering,MERALCO,however,denied this and said that they will never get any single centavo from this,because The Rate Hike would actually go to ABS-CBN Stars’ talent fees.

***

BATTLE OF THE HEADLINES :

GMA News : MERALCO to collect higher rates by November
TV5 News : MERALCO’s hike Unfair says Congressmen
ABS-CBN News : GMA,TV5 taking up revenge againts ABS-CBN

***

FUTURE HEADLINES :

Broadsheet :
Dela Paz : “It wasn’t Jueteng Money,It’s from Lotteng”
Dela Paz denies relationship with Versoza’s wife
PNP’s new Meaning : Pulos Nakaw na Pera
Bus Drivers to get Drag Racing course

Tabloid :
Doktor,Nalitson sa Kotse
Dela Paz : Di kami namasyal,Nag-sight seeing lang
PETA : Gatas ni Mommy,Melamine Free [Tara,Let's drink Mommy's Milk!]

***

PERSONALS :

Don’t Forget to watch Case Unclosed Tommorow night ,They will revisit the Merciless murder of  Maureen Hultmann and Roland John Chapman,Hosted by Kara David,Case Unclosed airs every Thursday after Saksi on GMA.